Wednesday, August 27, 2008

OK karma, I deserved that

So, I've been whining a lot. Whining about being pregnant. Whining about being big and round and oh so very hefty. "Poor me. I'm so big! People make rude comments." Blah, blah, blah. If you've been reading, you don't need a recap.

Well, karma busted my ass this week. It was all, "Look here you whiny procreating machine. If you're so sick of being a big mammoth whale, let me throw a little something else at ya and let's see how you like it." And so it went.

Karma served me up a big plate of food poisoning. And yes, after 12 hours of extreme projectile body fluids, I lost 12 pounds. Karma can be a real pain in the bootay if you know what I mean. "There oh pregnant one! You wanted to be a little lighter and now you've got it!"

What karma failed to realize is that I imagine most of that 12 pounds was water weight, seeing as how I was in a major state of dehydration. I'm pretty sure by the 11th hour I was barfing up actual amniotic fluid because I'm not sure there could be any other explanation.
Nothing a short stint in the hospital for some I.V.'age wouldn't fix, but major dehydration none-the-less. I thought they were going to have to saw one of my legs off to find an actual vein to tap into. Either my veins were so shriveled that they couldn't find one, or 3 evil nurses just got a kick out of repeatedly taking turns sticking me with a needle. Luckily I was hallucinating by that time, something about leprechauns doing gymnastics, so I was cool either way.

Anyway, it's good to be back- water weight and all. Point taken karma... point taken.

6 comments:

travelgirl said...

Oh my gosh, Beth. Had no idea you had all that going on. Glad you're feeling better.
S-

Amy said...

Oh you poor thing! That sounds terrible. And I HATE I.V.s so I would have completely lost it!

Smart A$$ Mom said...

Karma, Oh Karma....please bestow upon me the gift of food poisoning and insta weight loss? Ok, not really. Glad you're feeling better.

jamie said...

Crying here...laughing too hard over leprachauns doing gymnastics. Lordy Jane. Glad you're back on par!

cls-soon-to-be-B said...

glad you're back too ;)

Anonymous said...

Well, the good news is, the cute plaid pregger shorts fit again. I know, I saw her in them over the weekend, very cute!! But what a price to pay! GB :)